This is an experiment in writing from a third-person perspective about my life and how I became the person you might know. Many of the events here are based on reality, but many are the product of my thwarted imagination. Anyone in my life who is still alive should have no fear of seeing their name or deeds portrayed here. The characters are frequently composites and should not be assumed to be a specific person. Only those who have passed on will be discussed in an accusatory manner. And now they’ve been warned.